Wednesday, February 22, 2012

The Fight to Write

Every day I come up with issues or funny things that I would love to record or think out on my blog, but I just can't do it.  If you have children, you understand this.  There are so many moment-by-moment things calling (sometimes screaming) for my attention.  Sitting down to write is a fight, even with myself.  After answering "why" questions all day long, sometimes I just don't want to think anymore.  I just want to sit.  And crochet.  And listen to something funny.  And eat chocolate.  And shower.  Sometimes showering just takes too much energy though.  Please tell me someone else understand this.

But the days that I fight for it, the days that I actually sit down and write are the best days.  When that issue nagging me gets put in print so all my thoughts are a visible reality, it's a huge relief and a giant step in my processing.  The days that I sit right down and record the ridiculous things my 3 year old says are so sweet as I know others are reading and laughing at the craziness in my home as well.

Even as I finish typing this, I hear Benjamin rousing himself an hour too early.  I hear the dryer singing its "I'm done!" song.  I'm sitting next to a dirty high chair that is waiting for me to get motivated enough to clean it.  I'm mentally making myself stop. Think. Write.  Because when I do this, I'm a better mom.  A better wife.  A better follower of Christ.  Because a life without reflection is doomed to repetition.  A life without research and intentional decisions gets caught in the current of culture.

So maybe the fight to write is one of the most important battles I will enter... because it reminds me for Whom I fight and where the battle really is.  Something I need to remember as I raise my little warriors.

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